Workin’ in Korea Blues

Workin’ in Koree Blues

Scott Morley

 

In Korea

I made money

In Korea

I made money

Like a pizzeria

It was so funny!

 

Didn’t wanna go home!

Wa’ stay in Koree

No love at home

Wa’ stay in South Koree

Korean girl at home

Now America is where I be

 

Working hard

For soft pay

Working hard

For soft pay

Wanna work hard

Just don’t wanna play!

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Poem Dedicated to Asians

Asians

Scott Morley

 

Asian persuasions

Ambiguous confrontations

Constant Fixations

Terrible Temptations

Joyous Ejaculations

Bliss filled relations

Asians Asians and Asians

 

Blue-bottomed reindeer herders

Grain and gourd growers

Minnesotan dugout paddy pickers

Hoarding Mongol horse slickers

Slaving Apache lizard lovers

 

Gurkhas draped in boorkhas

Porting punkas up a steep Pun pitch

Munching sorts of radish pickles

From a small dish

 

Boiled soy-salted meat on soft pork feet

Or dog in a soup of sesame and leek

Wine made of horse milk, kumis is so sweet!

Momos of yak in pie crust of wheat

 

Gongs, and gold pagodas

Cuneiform Coca-Colas

Golden Eagles and

Yak-buttered biscuits

 

Seagulls, Silk and stole

Pestilence and plagues

One hundred-year old eggs

Sweet potato dregs

 

Bald begging bowls

Bon. Bokonon

Tibetan bulldog breeds

Wild spitz pees

Samoyed sled dogs dance

 

Matriarchal mommy’s thin little pants

Fringed and fishy shaman’s prance

Big foreheads – and narrow slants

 

Broad cheeks and seven weeks

Taught teats and tiny feets

 

Yes,

 

Asia’s where my heart still beats

Korean Mother-In-Law Blues

Korean Mother-in-Law Blues

Had a mother-in-law

From Korea

Yes! My mother-in-law

Lives in Korea!

But me, I’m stuck back here

Without my mother-in-law

 

She had veggie gardens,

And homemade wine

She had veggie gardens,

And homemade wine

I loved those veggie gardens

And where’s my sweet rice wine?

 

See my mother-in-law

She’s funny and sweet

My only mother-in-law

Just cannot be beat

She only four-foot tall

And such a lovely treat!

 

I work so hard

And never see,

What it is I want

But long as I is free

I’ll go back from

Whence I once come

Why Come Home?

Okay, so my first post was a bit gloomy, and returning to America after ten years in Korea, has not been easy, but in the end, after all options have been weighed:

Stay in Korea Pros:

  • cash for the whole family
  • work for my me and my wife
  • entertainment for the whole family
  • friendly neighbors and family
  • thorough and quality education for the boys

Korea Cons:

  • pollution for the boys
  • less athletic outlets for the boys
  • less natural surroundings for the boys
  • long work hours so less time with the boys
  • long school hours for the boys
  • less educational freedom for the boys
  • family obligation for all of us
  • limited english language exposure for the boys
  • limited opportunities to advance my/mia’s education
  • Prejudice or jealousy against the boys

America Pros:

  • english language exposure
  • multicultural exposure
  • comfie suburban living
  • little pollution
  • support from my parents
  • education for me and my wife
  • high grades in school for the boys
  • chance for the boys to get to know their american grandparents

America Cons:

  • little work for teachers
  • less pay for teachers
  • no respect for teachers
  • more difficult to support a family
  • violence
  • prejudice
  • less exotic scenes for me to write about

Two things trump all else. The boys need English fluency, and their parents need more college education.

Korean Mother-In-Law Diaries Midwest America

Greetings Expats, Koreans, Korean-Americans, Korea-lovers, Linguistics Lovers, Mixed-Marriage couples and hapa 1.5ers from across the globe!

For those who’ve never read my Mother-In-Law Diaries, in former expat magazine The Beat, and also in Pusan’s www.koreabridges.com, welcome to the Diaries: The Rebirth!

However I am not in South Korea anymore. Hopefully soon. But not yet.

Right now I’m back in America.

And for those of you considering returning to America with your new Korean wife and kids, all I can advise is DON’T DO IT!

There is nothing here! No culture! No education! No Employment! No bilingual bliss! And no mother-in-law!

No staggering throngs of smiling Koreans on their way to work and pleasure, no bull-headed ajummas with babies on their backs, no neon signs all night long, no dancing girls on the corners, no fried dumpling snacks, fried ho-dduck full of brown sugar, no hills full of houses looking out upon all that industry, or walks through neighborhoods with random old men to drink a cup of coffee with.

No Russians or Burmese sailors. No Ukrainian Lotte Dancers, no Uzbek hostess girls and nary a Korean girl within miles.

Still worse, there is no work, especially if you’re a teacher.

Because if you think maybe America has even a little respect for education then you’re wrong. Teachers in America are losers. They’re laughed at by student and parent alike. They’re even laughed at by other teachers. And it doesn’t matter whether you’re in the inner-city or the suburbs, elementary or college, don’t expect respect. Don’t expect to be paid much either, and don’t expect teaching in Korea to mean anything, at all, to anyone, back in America.

What I would not do to hear my students, “Hi teacher! How are you?!” My parents bowing and offering pared pears and green tea, plus at the end of four weeks that thick white envelope full of cash… Then hit the hot spas… Ah me.

Don’t underestimate the importance of cash, after being spoiled with it in Korea. Here in the states I don’t have enough cash in my pocket to buy a beer. If I had enough I wouldn’t bother because everyone else is so broke. Downtown Battle Creek is dead. Half the mall is closed. Half the buildings in town are for sale. And the population is decreasing.

In Korea I made 5,000 dollars a month and saved about 3500 of it each month. Here in Michigan my bachelor’s in English Literature and basic teaching certificate got me offers in Detroit (one of which I took, but I will blog that later), so I had to go back for my master’s.

To pay for my masters I use a new grant available in Michigan. It’s actually not so much a grant, as it is unemployment. It’s part of Michigan’s No Worker Left Behind. But they call it a grant, and I’ll take the money either way.

To receive the unemployment/grant payments on time I have to tell Michigan’s unemployment agency, that I refuse to return to school or work no matter what. And if I do get a job, I should lie, in order to continue receiving the grants.

It took me a while to believe that this could be true, that I should pretend to be a loser in order to receive grant money, and so I told the unemployment recording (MARVIN) the truth, that I’d actually like to work, and that I intend to go to school as soon as possible.

This was a bad idea, because it lost me two-months of cash. So from now on when our country’s social workers tell me to lie to the our country’s government, I guess I’ll take their word for it.